kenoathtravels.com - vietnam

One of the biggest mosques that we have ever seen, near KL Malaysia

TIP NUMBER 1: CROSSING THE ROAD IN VIETNAM
If you want to cross the road in Vietnam you have to have nerves of steel.
There are no pedestrian crossings so don't look for them.
If you stand at the curb and wait for a break in the traffic you will die of old age at that spot.
Now remember that in Vietnam they drive on the right side of the road.
Stand at the curb, look at all the oncoming traffic going both ways.
There are not too many cars, buses or trucks in the cities but don't try and cross if they are heading your way, wait for when there are just motorbikes and scooters and pushbikes.
Step from the curb into all of the motobikes and just walk. Do not stop at all, you will be doomed.
Remember, they are only going at about 20-30km so they will simply ride around you.
Keep focussed in front of you and don't look at the traffic, unless you hear a truck or bus, then you may have to speed the legs up a bit.
When you get to the other side you will feel your blood pressure going down, so find a bar and have a nerve calming Tiger Beer.
Of course smaller towns throughout Vietnam aren't too bad, and some even have crossings, but keep an eye out, a speeding scooter can come out of nowhere.

TIP NUMBER 2: DON'T GO DEAF IN THE MEKONG DELTA
There are as many tours you can join to explore the Mekong Delta as there are rivers, creeks and small inlets in the area.
We did a 2 day trip, spending a night in the middle of it all.
But to get there you have to endure a variety of different transport modes.
From bus, to boat, to smaller boat, to even smaller aquatic transport as you make your way through the small 'creeks' of the Delta.
The motors they use on their craft are not the quietest in the world, in fact not only do you get to hear every vibration but you feel it at the same time.
So the tip here is take some earplugs with you because a couple of hours of this consistant loud drone from an unmuffled engine will dull the eardums to the point of deafness!
We had no earplugs but a bit of chewed tissue stuck in the ears did the trick during our teeth rattling odysey through what they call the 'bread basket' of Vietnam.

TIP NUMBER 3: TOUTS
Touts. The most detested mongrel breed of human that walks this earth.
They prey on anyone and are found on every continent.
In Vietnam they have raised the bar in their attempt to infuriate travellers.
This is how the bastards operate.
You have been on an overnight bus/train for 12 hours.
You have had bugger all sleep so when you arrive at your destination you just want to get to a hotel, book in and crash for a few hours.
As soon as you arrive a smiling local strolls down the aisle and asks if you have a hotel to go to.
If you don't, they will say that they will get a taxi and you are whisked away to a hotel which they get commission from and the taxi driver gets paid by the hotel.
It's all well and good that the Touts will take you to a hotel but you will pay heaps more.
If you have already organised a place to stay and mention the name they say 'yes, we have a taxi that will take you there, free'.
BUT, you will be driven to the hotel of their choice anyhow.
Smiling hotel staff grab your baggage out of the taxi, but hey, I've got a booking at Hotel X or are returning to Hotel X because I was there a few days ago and all my stuff is there.
'It's OK, you can stay here, same price.'
'No, I want to go to Hotel X.'
After you literally tell them to get stuffed and try to get your baggage out of their hands you can storm out back to the street.
BUT, the taxi driver will say 'I will take you to your hotel'.
And he does.
BUT, again the hassles continue.
Remember that you were told that the taxi will take you to your hotel, free?
The taxi driver wants you to pay, and he argues like buggery before you back down.
The mongrel may even try to grab your bags before you can get into the hotel, or even when you are in the foyer.
We witnessed marathon arguments between taxi driver, unsuspecting tourist and reception staff, right down to nearly a fight.
The hotel usually settles it by paying the taxi driver but it's a bit unfair and obviously the taxi driver is just as bad as the touts, as they know that it's all a scam and they just want a bit of the action.
So the moral of the story is this.
Before you arrive at your chosen destination work out where you want to stay and get your bearings if you have a guide book with a map.
When the Touts rock up just get out of the bus and even though you probably don't know the lay of the land head to what looks like a major road.
Stand your ground and just tell them you know where to go, they lie and will NEVER take you to anywhere but their chosen hotel.
Taxi's will show up in no time at all and get them to take you to your chosen destination.
No hassles, no arguements, and you will be happy by the time you get into your room and have that well earned kip for a few hours.

You have to wonder about what goes on in the mind of the average advertising executive when they come up with names for products.
This question popped into my head as Edna and I headed towards Hanoi International Airport and passed a bloody big billboard on the side of the road.
It had a picture of a scooter with the caption:
'Ride the new Honda Smash'!
The fact that it seems that Vietnam is the Bermuda Traingle for motorbikes and the amount of accidents we saw there, maybe the name of this new model was quite appropriate.
28 days before pondering these questions we were bumping our way in our airbus through a tropical storm from Kuala Lumpur to the southern Vietnamese city of Saigon.
As usual we had driven from Alice Springs to Adelaide International Airport.
Dropped 'Holly the dog' off at Edna's brothers farm in the Flinders Ranges on the way where she was to 'run with the pack' and generally go feral in the paddocks and creeks.
Then off to Christies Beach where we got ourselves ready for our latest overseas adventure.
We decided to travel light this time so it was a backpack each packed with all the essentials we could stuff into them.
We took a bus to the local railway station which took us into Adelaide.
After an exotic gourmet lunch of 'railway hotdog' we took a taxi to the airport.
Booked in and Edna was quite amused when we were able to place our backpacks as cabin luggage so no baggage had to go under the plane.
Ed bought some duty free (to be picked up on our return) and before we knew it we were heading off to KLIA.
We were to stay the night in KL and then off to Saigon next day.
While waiting for our transport to the hotel two Australian couples were having a barney with the bloke running the transit bus. They did not want to give him their return transit vouchers (things get done differently in other countries). We tried to blend into the scenery as their voices and attitude got louder and more animated.
Talk about the ugly Australian.
And to make matters worse they got into the same bus as we did so the moaning continued all the way to the hotel.
Fortunately we were quick off the mark when we got there and before we knew it we had key in hand and were heading skyward to our room leaving the still grumbing quartet booking themselves in (I felt sorry for the girl at the reception desk, she may have copped the tail end of their grumbling).
The room was the size of a small flat! They had booked us into a suite . . . now this was more our style!
After a big brecky, a walk around, and a quick lunch we were heading back to KLIA for our plane trip to Ho Chi Minh City.
Saigon Airport looked like something out of an Eastern Block country.
And inside, very official looking, blank staring guards and customs officials stood like statues at their chosen 'X marks the spot'. It was straight out of a James Bond movie.
Single file, straight line, no talking and only approach the desk when called to.
I thought I was going to crack into hysterics as I stood straight backed in front of 'smiley' as he looked me up and down. His eyes fixed onto my top lip as he stated the obviously to me . . . 'no moustache?'
'Bloody hell!' I should have screemed "I must have left the thing in KL!!'
I was let through.
Edna was next and tried to explain that she was the one who told me to shave it off . . . he didn't bat an eyelid.
Amongst a sea of faces we saw our names on a card held by our driver.
Out to the car park and into the traffic to our hotel.
First impressions of the roads and users were 'I don't think they have roads here, just clearnings between buildings'.
The Hung Sen Hotel was pretty good digs. We had two nights booked so we were happy enough and the breakfasts were beautiful.
After we had booked in went for a wander to see what was on offer here in Saigon.
Wandered to the backpacker area of Saigon and checked out some hotels to stay in after our 2 days were up at the Hung Sen.
One hotel room we looked at had a laptop on the bed and all their clothes and gear around the place, the people who were staying there would have been horrified to know someone had been in their room.
Even picked up brochures for trips, especially the Mekong Delta and transport timetables to head north to Hanoi.
Had a feed in a Pub nearby and wandered back to our hotel for an early night.
Woke up fairly early to the sound of the contiuous traffic from the streets below.

Looking out of our hotel window in Saigon, very noisy indeed in real life!

Looking out of our hotel window in Saigon again, occupational health and safety at its best!
Good to see that he did have a rope wrapped around his waist, very safety conscious.

More 'best practice' methods being exercised on the shores of the Mekong Delta. Safety boots did not seem to be standard issue here!

Vietnam's answer to fast, takeaway food.